I am giving up on who I should have been,
a better person who never forgot
to remind you that I cared,,
remind you that I thought of you
even when it appeared I had not
ever let your ghost haunt me at night.
I can’t look back and feel okay about myself.
The way I talked,
the way I acted,
the way I thought I knew so much more than knowing.
I failed you.
I failed them all
and in doing so I lost it all.
I lost you.
I lost myself
in the blur of losing
at a game I never even wanted to play;
and remembering now
, like this,
it feels like nails against my heart
as you once pressed your head to mine.
So I’m sorry
because I never know what to say.
I never did.
I still don’t
except I truly am sorry
from the depths of my tattered heart.
I did it all wrong
and I am giving up on who I am.
-This poem is for somebody in particular but also as with all poems it is for anyone who feels this way towards somebody in their own life.
” Me and the pen, we are one. If its ink would cease to flow, my ink would cease to flow.”