It has already been a couple of years since my first adventures in The Big Apple. Now, I have more to report after my brief but bustling two day trip in NYC.
NYC reminds me of a hyperactive toddler being handed a king size Hershey’s bar and a large bowl of ice cream. The secret pulse and rhythm of the city still amazes me. Everything has a pace and a place. Everything is moving or moving towards moving and where there is a stillness it is always a stillness with purpose.
NYC also reminds me a little of human beings and internal strife. Compacted into such a relatively small space for everything that NYC has to offer is a mix of hope as well as fear; love as well as discrimination and hate; dreams coming true as well as shattered desires lining the side walks like discarded trash. NYC is truly a discombobulated yet cohesive environment of its own time, space, and dimensions.
So are we…
This time in NYC I found myself thinking a lot about where my current roads are leading me in the future. I thought about my own struggles and battles with adversity, facing my fears and faced with the facts that I still can not overcome many of them. It was a sucker punch to the gut realizing that I have come a very long way and added many miles to my internal strifes but yet have gone full circle in many respects.
Just like my late night wanderings in the city that never sleeps so to does my mind wander endlessly till it is sore and fatigued searching for a hidden purposes sheltered by blinding light, fear and renewal. The skyscrapers that lurk and tower over my inner being mimic those that towered over my entirely in Times Square.
Maybe this trip was not about what I thought it was going to be. I walked into this feeling lucky I was given such an opportunity and grateful that I had decided to take it. By the end, ready to go home , defeated, I realized this trip was not about relaxing or sight seeing NYC at all. This trip was about being forced to face things I have been ignoring in the simple security of life’s daily monotony. The complexity, unfamiliarity and unpredictability of NYC was simple the mirror in front of me challenging me to take much needed time to reflect and to no longer neglect my own internal strife. In the heart of a city swarming with traffic, mobs of selfies snapping tourists and irritated New Yorkers while lost navigating the subway I found answers I have been searching for for quite some time. In that internal strife I found the answers to mine.
– Eva M.M.
Previous Posts from my first time in NYC.
Thank you for reading and letting me know any questions, comments or recommendations. I would love to hear about your own personal experiences with NYC.
” Me and the pen, we are one. If its ink would cease to flow, my ink would cease to flow.”