‘Where will I be in five or ten years’, seems to be the question on everyone’s minds.What will I be doing? Will I be successful? Will I be okay, happy, poor or rich, single or dating, engaged or married? These are all questions that usually follow really soon after. And for what is all of this worry and wonder directed?Does this in the long run actually effect the outcome and turn on events in our lives, or does all of this energy we put into worrying about the future actually keep us back from the grand opportunities for our lives that are out there?This is a question that I have battled with for a grand portion of my life so far, and it is a question I know will be more prevalent in my life as I approach college. I have had plenty of time to think about the future since I was young but now it seems that it is all playing out. That is a lot to deal with, and a lot I have to think about. big decisions will have to be made that will ultimately take my life in one direction or another… The problem is I have never been much of a choose a path type of person but more of carve a path as you go type of person. Now, I can’t just take everything as I go… At some point solid decisions will have to be made. Where is there room for worry in that equation though?I think because I am now at this point in my life where I have a certain extent of natural worry ingrained into me, I am able to understand how irrelevant it is even more then I ever have before.That is right: I did just say that worrying about the future is irrelevant.No matter how much you do it, in the end it is what you carve out for yourself , the decision you make, the actions you do, and the things that you say that determine your future. Worrying won’t do anything for you but steal away your present joy. If you worry your entire life about what is next then you have no joy, and when things don’t work out how you had perfectly envisioned you blame yourself… you blame yourself and become bitter towards yourself and fall into a self-hatred that stabs you to sleep each and every night. It erodes away some part of you that for the longest time shone so brightly that it spoke to others of that rare, enchanting beauty in this world that causes us to want to make this journey the most precious of any we will ever make. In truth any other journey we do make is still only a mere speck on the timeline of this one.In the end… what matters is enjoying and being fully aware and present in this moment, as each and every moment glides into the next so elegantly.so next time those questions are trying to pry their way into the sanctuary of your mind… don’t let them. Meditate on this a little and breathe, and just be and know that somehow things will be okay and whatever choices you make will lead you somewhere beautiful as long as you harbor beauty within yourself.
Let me know any comments, thoughts and/or questions you have in the comments below.
-Wishing you the brightest of days,Eva
” Me and the pen, we are one. If its ink would cease to flow, my ink would cease to flow.”